Okay. I need some help - I think we all know that to be true. The way my mind and mood and all that palaver is at the moment I need to check one thing to be true, because I nearly very much lost my cool today…
Over a campfire song.
This is the offending item:
The Indians they are
High minded
Bless my soul
They’re double jointed
They climb hills and
Don’t mind it
All day long
As soon as I saw this my Political Correctness alarm went off. Especially considering that this is to be sung by children. Am I being too sensitive or is this one of those songs that should be deleted from any list that it appears on? To me it just feels offensive… Am I losing my mind?
The second thing I need hep about is from someone who has/ had ties with a Boy Scout of America Troop. To explain. My brother has nearly finished all his work for his Scout Leader Warrant. He needs to do one more section - International. He is doing the good ol’ US and is going to host a meeting filled with all things American on… wait for it… July 4th! He needs help with any traditions, games, activities, food or anything else that the Boy Scouts of America may do/ have at their meetings… any help would be greatly appreciated!
Also it was decided today at work that I should get into politics and become Prime Minister… There are a lot of things that need sorting out - like a careful rota for people with buggies to go out when other people don’t need to use the streets… and making it a crime to use Marks and Spencers at lunch time to do your weekly shop… or not buy lunch.,,
Obviously an overhaul of the NHS and schools - how would I pay for this?
Every single time someone complains about a mobile phone being used to play music without the use of headphones the manufacturer of the phone gets fined a billion pounds? A little excessive? No… no… no… And the person holding the phone at the time gets headphones surgically implanted in their ears.
Another thing that I’m sure will be a vote winner is my new improved punishment for litter droppers (this will include dropping ash from a cigarette on the ground). They get the choice of an on the spot fine of £1000 (for anything smaller than a Mars Bar wrapper (anything larger and it’s £5000 an item) or 120 hours picking up litter dressed as an animal of the local Judge’s choice.
There was a suggestion for Chav parks, like Dog Parks - sectioned off parts of public parks where the idiot children of Britain can hang out safely away from the good people. These would be surrounded by the lovely mosquito teenage alarms just in case they tried to escape… and they would have to be dropped off and picked up by their parents.
Oh and for the little sods that did manage to annoy anyone? A 2 year stint in either the Army or a tough boarding school… if their grades slipped to the Army they go…
It’s a start. Who wants to be my campaign manager?
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