Okay, so you know how you always had that dream that one day a you from the future would come back to tell you how to live your life? Well, here you are.
Right now you are miserable. Your GCSE’s are not going as well as you’d like, you’re convinced you are never going to really know love and that life isn’t worth living. Go to a doctor. Tell them how you feel and make them listen. Depression is not a dirty word. Prozac will make you feel sick but this doesn’t mean you should give up on anti-depressants. Trust me, you don’t have to feel this way – there is no magic cure but there is help. In fact, go to the doctor more – that’s what they are there for. Just because you have had some idiot’s in the past does not mean that you will not find a good one. They do exist.
And while I’m on this subject – you will never get a better opportunity to get into shape. Go swimming, walk places, go to the gym. Get over the embarrassment. You will feel better for it. I know it sounds like nagging but listen to the voice of experience. It’s only going to get harder.
Try not to worry quite so much. You are never going to be everyone’s best friend but there is no one out there who truly hates you. In fact you will find out more people know who you are and like you at school than you ever imagined. And I am still friends with them now. Life is not a rehearsal, even though you play things out and over-analyse them before they have happened,
Don’t accept things because it feels too hard to change them. The school is going to screw you with your A-Levels. Fight to keep the subjects open. And for God’s sake, don’t take Business Studies or Maths. You may like the cold clinical world of maths but your brain just isn’t built for it. Not the way it’s taught at sixth form.
Keep writing, even when you think you are just repeating yourself over and over, one day you will use those piles of notes and wish you had more. I’m not going to tell you that everything you write is golden but… it’s certainly shiny.
Save some money. Really. I know you think you’re going to have plenty but… well, no. Do not become one of those statistics. In fact, re-evaluate your whole outlook on money. Keep the generous streak but remember to look after yourself and always have something in reserve.
You are going to meet some wonderful people over the next few years. They will make you feel as if you are the best person in the whole world to know. You don’t need to impress them. You do not have to be better than every one else.
There is going to be one person who will break your heart for no reason. I tell you this not so you can avoid the experience, because everyone should have his or her heart broken once (just once), but so that you don’t let it kill that spark I know you still have.
The computer is a good place to hide, and as you will discover – a great place to let yourself go. In fact learn as much as you can about it. Really learn. Oh, and buy an Apple Mac as soon as you can afford to. Life becomes so much easier then!
Sing. More. Everyday. You’ll regret not having the practice. Dance whenever you can. Grab every opportunity with both hands. The only regret you should have is for the things you did not do. Oh, and get serious about learning a musical instrument. You won’t believe how many times that’ll help you!
I want to give you a list of people and places to avoid and ones to run towards but if I did that you would not be living – just following a script. And, although we both know how comforting that is, it means you miss out on the spontaneous and that’s what makes you feel alive.
Oh, and don’t say I never gave you nothing but some hokey advice. A little pressie for your 21st birthday. The winning lottery numbers for Saturday 10th April 1999 were 10, 18, 25, 32, 35, 36 Bonus Ball 2.
Bec (Aged 29)