Out Of My Tree
I’m not ‘boring’. I’m English.
I’m not ‘boring’. I’m English.
Jan 14th
With a hope in my heart that he gets better soon, here for your pleasure my favourite Jobs quote.
Yes, I am feeling a little tired today.
“.. almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”
And I’m trying, Mr. Jobs, I’m really trying.
Jan 13th
Coffee, free wi-fi and 30 minutes peace. That’s everyday after work and before I go home where I can’t concentrate.
And I have to find a screwdriver when I get home as there is somethign decidedly loose on the bottom of my MacBook.
Oh, and can someone remind me to send out the Scout minutes.
And to buy some more work appropriate tops as I have just realised I have worn the same 5 in rotation for the last three weeks. I swear people at work! I do have other clothes. Just to prove it I may wear a skirt tomorrow.
Unlikely. But I may.
Damn, it took so long to get my coffee that now I have to go.
Jan 12th
Seriously.
Right on the chops.
I have got to SNAP out of this. I mean I don’t have it as bad as some people but I have got to distract myself with something non Twilight related. Bit difficult when I’m writing Twilight fan fiction but it’s becomeing something everyday.
Am I having my teenage super obsessional years now? I mean, my God, I found myself watching HSM2 on TV today! The second one – the un-good one!
Oh God! I’m using words like un-good!
Before you know it I’ll be hanging posters of prettiness on my door and saying goodnight to them.
I’m in trouble.
Jan 11th
Today, apparently, is Step in a Pubble and Splash Your Friends Day
But typically it is not raining here (for a change) so I can’t.
Big melodramatic sigh.
…
…
Sorry.
Just feeling a little lonely today. I know it’s my fault for not being sociable.
I am always being told what an outgoing and social person I am. “Wow, you’re so good with people.”
No. I really am not. It’s all just an act and I am having trouble with the part I am supposed to play.
I kinda just want to hide in the dark and listen to music if that’s okay?
Jan 10th
No no no not writer’s block – although I am fairly certain that can’t be too far away.
Jan 10th
Is Saturday. I lazy.
This make me giggle like a fish… if fish could giggle.
Yes. I know you have seen it before.
Jan 9th
So pathetically tired right now
But in a good way
Staying up all night
Writing
And then taking Mum to breakfast instead of getting a couple hours kip
Stupid
But smile worthy.
Jan 8th
Okay so the writing – sounds impressive at the moment. Especially to me considering I have been able to write only what is on this blog and the 26000 odd words in NaNoWriMo over the last 12 months BUT it comes with a proviso.
Sorry? What?
I am… cough… currently writing FanFiction.
Yes.
Trust me. I know.
NOw a lot of Fanfiction that I have read over the years (I used to proof read a lot of Buffy stuff back in the day…) just seems to be a way to make sure that the characters you love and adore y’know do the nasty nasty in lots of terribly poor horrible pornagraphic ways, most of which (if they were published) would be instantly up for the The Literary Review’s Bad Sex in Fiction Award (a quick aside – 2008′s awards shortlist passages are here for a good giggle).
Not that I am knocking the sex. I mean who wouldn’t want a little more lovin’ bewteen certain characters. I remember when Mulder and Scully finally kissed my head nearly exploded (and yes I know there are some that think that that was when it jumped the shark but screw you I loved that relationship)… but I get waaaaaaay too emotionally involved in things as we all know.
Anyway; as well as having characters flying in to one location and having a total nightmare with time differences; I may have backed myself into a corner with having to write a potential lust love scene. Now I could go all Mills and Boon-y and do it all behind closed doors or I could go with the graphic description-y thing. Either way it’s going to be quite bad.
I never really know how to describe the action… and which words do you use? Cute pet names? Gynaecologically correct terms? Oh baby oh baby? All of which has potential for disaster. The last time I even vaguely touched on the subject was during GBBMC08 (oh those heady days!) when I wrote a short piece of fiction (no, I’m not going to make you read the whole thing – that would just be cruel) and well… this was the end result.
The kiss was sudden and deep. Frantic movements full of hunger, longing, animal. Her jacket hit the floor at the same time his did. She pulled at his shirt and he threw it off as she unbuttoned his jeans. He pushed up the nightdress and broke the kiss long enough to pull it over her head. He gasped as he realised she was naked and pulled her to him, trying to make them become one person. She continued to set him free of his clothing and he stepped out of his jeans and shorts. The whirlpool of emotion that surrounded them tightened and her breasts heaved as she gasped a lungful of air. Their movements slowed as he lowered her onto the sofa and entered her with a force that only passion could be behind. She arched into him bit her lip as he thrust into her, not in any way expertly or thoughtfully, but unrefined, needfully, desired. He came inside her and collapsed against her breathlessly. She held his head against her, feeling his breath on her neck and smiled.
He was saying something but she couldn’t hear. Her heart was pounding so loud it threatened to explode from her chest.
He moved above her, looking into her eyes and uttered again the request to take it upstairs.
Tomorrow would bring panic and morality; embarrassment and explanations, but right now in the dark it was the way it always should have been.
Actually it makes no sense without the rest if it…
But the sex isn’t really what I’m writing about here.
FanFiction, whilst hard (living up to lots of people’s expectations as you write your version of their most loved characters, trying not to copy established pots, trying not to come across as ridiculous, trying to not get lost in ‘clever’ (they’re never clever) inside jokes) does help me skip what is, to me, the hardest part of writing – coming up with believable characters.
I get HOPELESSLY involved in character creation – back stories galore! I know what hey had for breakfast the day they started High School and what their favourite colour was on their 12th birthday. I create playlists of music on my iTunes that each character would have and can tell you their first kisses, favourite Subway sandwich, and their phobias – all of which would probably never be mentioned in the story. I get so involved in the back story that my last two ‘things’ (for they are neither stories or novels or anything substantial) became histories and collapsed under the weight of information. Not pretty sights. There were tears.
But I do have a tale brewing in the back of my head. So to get going with the writing I always do a bit a FanFicion-ing. It’s a fun and fairly pain free way of helping my flex the right muscles and getting them warmed up before I run the gauntlet of original material.
The bad thing is this time is I am getting into the FanFiction in a big way and am really enjoying the story. I signed up to a FanFiction website and am actually letting people see it… I am hoping to update that story 2 or 3 times a week which has the added bonus of fulfilling a resolution and giving me an ego boost. I am REALLY hoping that I don’t do that thing where I get bored before the end and drift off until I am just dribbling… ooo, like now!
Hmmm… the wordiness isn’t just effecting (affecting?) my fiction. Sorry for the long post.
Jan 7th
Why on earth couldn’t this happen last November? Huh?
I am averaging 4000 words a day at the moment which is, for me, phenomenal! Yes, I am bursting all over with creativity. And it feels good.
I have, however, realsied, that my Christmas theme is still up and apologise wholeheartedly for this. I will sort it out… erm… tomorrow?!
Ooo, but that reminds me. I found a song which I love. Played abusively loud.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxo3OnekPg8
I hate it when they disable embedding…
It really kicks off my day well… and I’m going to find some way of getting it into the Scout AGM (Only 4 and a half months to go!)
Jan 6th
Well not really apologetic… Have been writing! Yes writing!
And therefore am braindead to anything else.
Oh. still having internet connectivity issues… Am this close to buying another new wireless boxy thign.
See, the writing has removed technical words from my head!