I’m not ‘boring’. I’m English.
people
Sad Pitiable People
Feb 12th
I have been there.
Your life is going terribly and your only joy in life is making other people feel miserable and crappy for being happy, but really did you have to?
Neil and I did a terrible thing. We joined in a bit of fun on Facebook (fun… you know, that thing you don’t have because you are too cool or whatever) for Valentine’s Day. We both posted
To celebrate Valentines Day, change your profile picture to you and your spouse/significant other and make sure to tell how long you’ve been together!!
and changed our profile pictures.
Although this heinous crime raised not one eyebrow on my page, on Neil’s it got sneering from 2 complete fuckwits who really get my back up. Is Neil not allowed to be happy and revel in his happiness? Is it an affront to your world view that someone smiles and thinks the world isn’t a terrible place to live in for five minutes?
I’m not saying you should be all sunshine and rainbows, unicorns and candy-floss but if you wouldn’t mind terribly keeping your negative, and not entirely helpful thoughts to yourselves, you tossers of the highest degree.
And here’s something else that you probably want to sneer at.
From cute-n-tiny.com
Normal service will be resumed after a brief cuddle in front of the TV.
Distraction Technique
Oct 27th
Am leeching off dear friend Neil’s wi-fi as the ‘incredibly generous person’ near me who had an open connection got wise and closed it. Wise person… grrrr… Anywho.
There is wrestling on the TV which disturbs me. There are men bitching at each other like two old ladies. This is the oddest place I have posted in… and my mind is blank. I think this will take forever to write.
Relationships. That’s what the conversation is about. Re-la-tion-ships. Yep. There’s a conversation I am really good at. (Any of you laughing are getting a glare… and then an embarrassed nod.)…
Currently about how many degrees of separation is sensible between ex- and current. A friend of your ex is okay, but a best friend is a no. The best is the bit which is important because, says one, your current girlfriend has to have someone they can talk to about you… because your ex can never talk to your current girlfriend. One was telling about the ‘scariest moment of his life’ – the moment his current girlfriend admitted knowing his ex… so it’s not really the ‘best’… it’s the friend… (See bloke’s change their minds too)…
The other bloke – yes, in a heartbeat.
I put forward ‘would you go out with a friend of a friend of your ex?’
At first it was a straight yes from one… buuuuuuut, oooo, chinese whispers of information would get through and would this be worse? There is the thing that excuses can be made easily, ‘she’s crazy – it never happened like that’…
Ex’s sister? Yep.
Ex’s mother and all other age appropriate female relatives? (Yes from one) The other umm-ed and argh-ed about it – it apparently depends on how close they are. (Not how closely related they are, how close friends they are).
Would the men here go out with their best friend’s ex? Yes, yes, yes. There is an element of violence (this started a one up – you’d never be able to hurt me thing which was quite funny) coming from their best friend that they would have to deal with… and also an element of comparison… buuuuut if she was a supermodel and his best friend was on the other side of the world it wouldn’t matter.
The supermodel clause apparently overrules everything.
And because I like to torture them (and my mind was still blank) – who is the most attractive woman in the world? Eliza Dushku as the first straight answer from ‘depends guy’ (whereas we all know it’s Katherine Heigl)… The one who said yes to sleeping with anyone said “there is no such thing as the most attractive woman in the world – every woman is beautiful in her own way” which simultaneously made me go awwwww and throw up a little. Mind you he said this while playing Battle for Middle Earth 2.
Both men are single. Both men have complicated ex- lives. Both men need help… A little…
The reason why I posted all this is because I have been watching too much CNN and freaking out about So-Cal and all you guys who live there. I am hoping, wishing, praying that you are all okay… The news is really scary. I shouldn’t be allowed to watch the news channels.
[tags] mind of man, degrees of separation, [/tags]
Really Beginning To Grate
Oct 2nd
This is hard. Trying to write a post when I’m not in the habit. I have been writing in my diary again for the first time in ages just to have an outlet for the drivel in my head. I suppose I could just post to the local version of Camel but it doesn’t feel right. I guess I really do write for an audience. But here goes.
Okay, so. I am in a position of needing a job quite desperately. I went and sat in a recruitment office for what felt like 1000 years while they reeled off jobs that I am either a) not qualified to do; b) am over-qualified for (their words); c) would be bored doing (do I look like I care about being bored?) or d) can’t do because I don’t drive.
I really need to get back on that particular saddle again. Desperately.
Desperate, as you may be able to tell is the word du jour (is that right, who can tell?).
So, the housemates left. Presumably they went back to South Africa but who can tell? They left telling me they were going on holiday to the Canary Islands for a week. That was nearly a month ago. I had an inkling that something was goign on but genuinely thought that… ARRRRGGHHHH… y’know? Mind you it’s better that they are back in S.A. and not, where my mind went, dead on a beach somewhere. So, tha plus no job plus life means I am leaving my lovely house 
and finding something new. Again.
But before all that a mission has become cleaning the house and not living like a student for 10 minutes. I put books and nonsense on shelf. And then took a photo. A hard days work.
So, world, oyster etc. Maybe I should sign myself up to one of those mail order bride websites and find me a rich American… except I’m not Russian/Eastern European/sexy in anyway. But I can take photos (ish), write (ish) and I do a mean Excel spreadsheet.
It has been pointed out to me that I came off as a little nuts in that post a few months ago. Again. drunk. Red wine I should stay away from oh yes. Cough.
So TV is in no way as exciting as it is in the States where all the shows I love are showing season +1 to whatever was just on here but as least Ugly Betty starts on Friday and Robin Hood season 2 is on Saturday and Californication (little nostalgic sigh for David Duchovny) starts on the 11th… and Studio 60 is still delighting me every single week. there probably are other things I should be enjoying but sleep and writing, yes WRITING have become quite big parts of my day. I am writing what I know which means the end result will be interesting to me and a small circle of people who thought they knew me. Ish. It was going to be a straight telling of my humdrumness but I have dragged two or three fictional things out of the cupboard and am schmooshing them all together to make a worldwide bestselling tour de force that will be finished early 2008…ish. Yes, I am definitely going to finish this particular project. Oh yes.
I can’t believe I have missed Talk Like A Pirate Day and all that September brings. The internet really has become like a second home for me and not being able to get on is like having the door to my favourite room blocked up, or being told you can never eat cheese on toast again.
I am also having trouble believing that it’s October. then I step outside into the biting cold that has descended, fall over the 5 million conkers lying on the pavement and I raise my hands and proclaim, “I believe, Hallelujah!” or something similar.
Scout things are going well. We had our re-opening and made money (even though it was not a fundraising event). Even when we don’t try we can do it. Since then we haven’t really had a ‘thing’ to work for so focus is being lost. I, of course, have no life so was starting to obsess a little about it. But after nearly walking out on it for good last month calm has prevailed and I have realised that there are some people you are never going to change, there are some people who are never going to get excited about things again, there are some people who have lives that have more than one thing in them. Crazy.
Okay. I am going to go back to Bloglines and try to visit everyone. If I don’t get to you it doesn’t mean I don’t love you; because I do, I truly do; it’s just alphabetical. I will on my next visit to a hotspot. I swear.
Until next time.
[tags]job hunting, house hunting, housemate hunting, TV, Scouts,[/tags]
Answers are Coming…
Jul 13th
… All being good I’ll hit the videopost out of the park tomorrow. I’m just going to record it and then force one of my housemates to watch it (I’m sorry) to check that I don’t look so bad that I’ll frighten small children and then bang it online. It’ll be simple and easy after that…
I have had a couple of days of busy-ness – well, to the outside observer it would have looked a lot like sitting on my arse in front of a computer but they would be wrong.
No, it was a lot like swearing at Word while I tried to redesign Certificates of Appreciation. I am this close, this freakin’ close to just dumping the whole thing through Photoshop and… oh, I don’t know anymore. I finally got rid of the letter about 20 minutes ago (the one I was supposed to have finished
before Thursday but who’s counting?!
Facebook has kinda exploded even more recently – more people from school have appeared (well, they’ve been on there for a while but I’d never hunted them down as, past experience shows, that I am the only one in my old social circle with an online life – pfff, blown that one out of the water) and it feels great and safe and ‘normal’. They all just seem so much more grown up than me! Yes, I am a child. And a fuckup (do you think that’ll raise my PG rating?).
I did plug in some old names into the search just to see who I could find, and someone I never wanted to see/hear from again has added herself in the past week. So I’m kinda hiding behind a virtual broadsheet hoping against hope that she doesn’t spot me!
Going to bed in a mo – am definitely leaving the Mac downstairs… otherwise it’s all just too tempting… But first I’m going to finish watching Mr Jealousy, a 1997 Eric Stoltz movie, that has been on and distracting me in a major way while I tried to finish this.
Oh, the credits are rolling… And so are the tears.
[tags]blog, questions, Facebook,[/tags]
Short of Words
Jul 10th
I was at a Scout Committee Meeting tonight… It went on for 3 hours. It was very wordy tonight. I forgot everything I actually wanted to talk about… until right now… It doesn’t really matter.
Long story short – we are considering doing a CD of Christmas Carols/Songs to raise some cash and awareness this year (which I first thought about way back when…
This involves a lot more than I thought it would at first. The first problem, of course, being the legalities of the whole thing – the whole Copyright thing seems to be a mess… a mess which does not appear to have an answer anywhere online… We’re going to bother local radio stations and the usual to see if anyone out there has a clue about what we can or can’t do… I mean, come on… we’re a registered charity… give us a break people!
And then comes the where, when and who? Bless the kiddies but some of them do sound like foghorns but should they still be on the CD in the spirit of fairness or should we just Simon Cowell them out of the building? And when? Well, in oder to get the CD ready by the beginning of December the tracks have to be finalised by the middle of November so… recording beginning of November… the last time you really want to think about Christmas… ugh… And where… it has to have good acoustics… and has to be big enough to fit all the kids in. (Currently estimating about 150 of them… Fun.
This is one of the things that is keeping me going at the moment. I mean, my weekend was so full of sitting around and watching moving pictures on screens that I didn’t know what to do with myself! Busy busy busy!
But seriously, every time I bobbed online and tried to concentrate on reading blogs or doing my email or playing with Facebook my brain would hurt. Literally. I’ve had this headache on and off for about 2 weeks now! So, I’m not ignoring you I’m just getting there – k?
Right, onto designing invitations and certificates.. and ooo, doing the minutes of the meeting… only 13 pages to type up!
[tags]Scouts, cd, christmas, [/tags]
Cookie Master
Jun 29th
So today was the day I decided to risk the world ending and see if I could actually make cookies with the Hershey’s Peanut Butter Kisses that the gorgeous and wonderful Lia sends me from the sunny and beautiful States!
Lookie!!!
They taste really good surprisingly – so good in fact I am going to take a couple for my Mum/Dad/Brother when I see them tomorrow…
I’m having a chuffed moment as the last time two times I tried to make sweet things were the incredible frisbee sponge (too much sugar) and the flapjacks that were black on the inside (too hot an oven). I mean, I suppose you can’t really go wrong with cookies… who am I kidding I can get anything wrong in the kitchen!!! I hope Mum likes them… well the tiny bit she’ll have…
I also found (what I thought was) the impossible today – a doctor that listens! So blood tests ahoy and I may get t the bottom of what the hell is wrong with me!
Yes, I did the Simpson’s avatar thing – here’s me… couldn’t quite get the hair colour right but it’ll do…! Thanks, Dave, for pointing this out.
There is a rather large group of chavs standing on the other side of the garden wall playing really bad chart dance on their mobiles. I wouldn’t mind (well, I do) but there are two different songs going at the same time! If I wanted to get my windows smashed I would go out there and wave my fist at them but I like sheets of glass protecting me from the weird ass weather…
But it’s Friday night so I’m going to do the thing I love most in the world at the moment… drop a couple of Ibuprofen and go to bed as a stinking headache has just pounced.
Love to you all…!
[tags]cookies, doctors, Simpson’s avatar, chavs,[/tags]
Bleurghy-ness
Jun 12th
I just want to kick off with an apology to Moobs for being a moron and spoiling the season finale of Ugly Betty for him. I will have myself taken out back and shot later.
And then I want to apologise for the on again off again posting. I am still under the spell of the bleurghy monster and cannot seem to escape.
ANYWAY, the weekend was the annual insanity known as Club Day in Kirkham (photos over on Flickr). The weather was beautiful, the parade was long and colourful and all was good… except there was this odd feeling in the town. There were four times as many police about and all the shops were closing at 2pm… on a Saturday… on the busiest Saturday in Kirkham’s non-Christmas trading year. So I questioned my personal local expert (my Mum) and she told me, almost nonchalantly, that they were expecting trouble from ‘the Manchester lot’.
This refers to a huge event last year when a group of locals got drunk and kicked a visitor from Manchester to death. It effected the entire town; one of the young lads involved was a schoolfriend of my brother’s. It was horrible… and there have been repercussions. The amount of flowers outside the bank when it happened blocked off part of the main road; and everyone gets nervous around anniversary and event days.
On Sunday, I dragged my tired arse to church looking out for any destruction but couldn’t see anything – all reports seem to be the town got itself wound up into a tizzy over nothing. Maybe now that the trial is over and the perps are in jail it will calm down… but never be forgotten.
So even though the weather was almost perfect the whole weekend had a pall over it… but it felt good to get out of the house.
Now I just have to try and feel better.
[tags]Kirkham Club Day 2007,[/tags]
The Looks Are A-Changing
Jun 5th
The too fabulous for words Hilly brought up a point in a comment on one of my less than impressive posts (although pics of Depp and Bloom!) about the changing look of ‘Camel. And the comment has festered and I had a look. Yep, it’s changed 7 times in the last 2 months. There are reasons both deep and very very shallow.
Deep one first. When the rest of your life is turning into large amounts of pooch poo you turn to things you think you can fix. Last month it was me stressing about the Scout AGM Slideshows, this month it is Camel.. Yes, my dear blog. I am going to screw around with your look confusing all the passing readers until I am duly satisfied (insert evil laugh).
I thought I had it with this but the column sizes are all out of whack and the colours of the fonts (no matter how many times I change them) never seem to do the thing they are supposed to. I am almost hankering for the days when all you had to know was HTML. God, how I miss them days… Now I feel old.
I recently bought a new domain name, which was the name of my very first website, co-authored over much alcohol with a uni friend, sited on Geocities when you had cities and homesteads and felt like you belonged (Just so you know Out Of Our Tree was sited in Area51.. yes, we were that cool… honest). It was the first place the phrase Have You Seen My Camel? was used in a title-y way. We, being Writing/Drama students, had noooooo idea whatsoever about design and thought the blue writing on neon pink, and lime green writing on red looked really striking. And there were loads of rotating titles and logos all about. Everything that could, moved. I think there were even several marquee banner things. I think it was the booze…
When I think back on it though, it was a blog-ish. There were side projects like the quest to get a pool table from the local pub but basically it was just a place where we put the random thought that entered our heads through long nights avoiding the work thing.
There is nothing left of that first effort now except my memories and, of course the name. Now, a solo project it’s more Out Of My Tree… and I will have to do something with it. Y’know. as soon as I get this site right.
And the shallow reason. Sweatpantsmom pointed this blog, Phatterism, out, I saw and wanted to cry. It’s just too shiny. And the rest of you, I yell out, pointing my bottle of Tequila that I keep in a bag especially for these moments… You’re all just too good. Grumble, whinge. How do you do it?!
So, I’m sorry if the ever changing themes get on your nerves. It’ll settle as my real life stabilises. Anyway, that’s what RSS feeds were made for.
But this is my blog and I get to do shout outs to whoever I like (no matter how terrible they look).
Happy Birthday Anna-Marie, you rock.
[tags]old websites, Geocities, Phatterism, design, [/tags}
Tenuous Links
May 31st
In the annual Tenuous competition over at Moobs’ Blog, a nomination for me (and lot’s of other people…) has occured. Absolutely loving these sort of fabulous contests I am proudly displaying my badge for all to see… just like last year!
The whole point of the game is to (quote Moobs) “come up with a tenuous connection to a celebrity. The cheesier or weirder the celebrity the more points you get. The more tenuous (or weirder) the connection the better too (although there is a cut-off point – seeing them on television does not count, nor does merely living in the same country).”
Mine is the absolutely true story about sitting on Richard Branson’s knee when I was but a wee girl… while he was being the village’s Santa Claus… I will dig up a photo at some point… Remind me.
This is also my way of pressganging your vote by asking you to drift over to this post and proclaim in some massive shouty (but hugely polite way) that you really feel I should win… unless you don’t… at which point I may cry… and then stop around and read some of Moobs wonderful posts… for he truly is marvellous… I wonder if all the brown-nosing will get me extra points?
(Don’t worry Yorksdevil – I know you’ve already voted… and I don’t hold it against you at all!)
[tags]Tenuous Connections 07, Moobs, Moobz, voteforme![/tags]
Starting To Worry
May 29th
There’s a moment when you’ve been feeling crappy for a while that you start to wonder if something is really wrong. I have been feeling tired and generally urgh for months but it is getting worse.
And I know what you’re going to say – Go and see a doctor. I would but my old doctor died and I haven’t, as yet, found another one that I trust. I have been through 5 doctors in the last 2 years. It’ll take them to say just one stupid thing and that’s me gone.
One told me to get more sleep… this was just after I’d told him that I had been sleeping on average 16 hours a day, another advised me to get more exercise and drink plenty of fluids… sigh. After I told another that I was depressed to the point of feeling suicidal she told me to cheer up!!! Jeez! The one before the one who died was okay and sent e for lots and lots of tests which came back with inconclusve results… and then moved to New Zealand. The last one, who died, would just write me sick notes to take time off work… after I told him I couldn’t take anymore time off work.
So now I’m back on the hunt for a new one. This is not fun and not easy. Hardly any of the GPs in this city are able to take on any more patients, and even if they are they have the most ridiculous surgery times 9-5, 10-4, one is open from 10-12 and then 2-4. So I am thinking about going private even though it’ll end up costing the earth… just to get someone to understand that I am not just in need of some sleep.
On a more positive note we raised over £1550 on the weekend bag pack for the Scouts so we can now afford flooring!
[tags]ill, tired, doctors[/tags]
