Out Of My Tree

Have a magical Halloween!

I will admit to being scared.  Any time I leave my comfort zone and go to a geek heavy situation I get… well, fucking terrified.  This is because I have goldfish memory about geeks.  I forget that, while we are seen by the rest of the world as pedantic and oh so very aloof, when crowded together we are some of the friendliest and most inviting people in the world.

I was reminded strongly about this during the Jonathan Coulton/ Paul and Storm extravaganza I attended last night.

I arrived early, as is my way, but almost immediately started talking to one of the lovely people in the room, swopping geek one liners and the blank stares we would get when we tried to talk about the concert.

Paul and Storm.  I’ll admit that I had only heard of them in reference to JoCo but now I have placed myself firmly on a magnificent road of discovery. They were, what’s the word, amazing.  The songs were witty and catchy and totally relevant… sounds weird to say this but they spoke to every single person in the room.

Audience participation.  Normally these two words make me cringe and run to the back of the room but the uncomfortable feeling never came.  They were the perfect opening act.  I know I shall be singing The Captains Wife’s Lament, Nugget Man and Count To Ten a lot.  Yes.  I bought the CD… and a t-shirt.  Hey, idea! You should too!  Go here to buy things – you won’t regret it.

After a short intermission, the man himself.  He walked onto the stage in such an unassuming manner that quite a few people didn’t even realise he was there.  I always imagined him to be so… It felt like you could sit and have a pint with him.  Lovely.

His set was perfect.  We all sang along to the ones we knew, and listened intently to the ones we didn’t.  He made jokes only geeks would get (but never excluded anyone) and then called us on it.  Yes, I have been called a geek by Jonathan Coulton.  Well… not personally but as part of the crowd.  I feel defined.

He asked us to be a little more ‘zombie’ and a little less ‘choir of angels’ during Re: Your Brains so he moaned and mis-sing through the chorus.  But this was just one way in which he brought the songs I love to life.  Every facial expression brought the songs closer to life.

When he did Mr Fancy Pants using his iPhone – how freakin’ cool is that? (there was a little Rick Astley) – before leaving the stage in a Radiohead cacophony of sound… Brilliant.

For the encore he brought Paul and Storm back for Creepy Doll – which after the first verse he stopped, saying there just wasn’t enough creepiness… so he wondered if there as someone in the audience who could help with that.  Surprise, surprise… there was

Neil Gaiman.

Geek-gasm a go-go!

He read the second verse after the audience calmed down and then shook a little tambourine.  Just a little cool… just a little magnificently cool.

As they left the stage for the last time my buzz carried over into the moment when I looked at my watch and realised that I had to get across town in 15 minutes to make my train so I had to time to meet and greet and get things signed (dejected arrrgh) and that there would be no second visit to the merch table (double dejected arrrgh).  Thank the internets for the JoCo Store!

There is joy in this world. It is brought to you by Paul and Storm and Jonathan Coulton.

P.S.  There will be pictures when I have them developed.  Film.  Honestly… how did we do it in the past?  God, I miss my digital camera.

There will be a long post tomorrow about what I’m doing tonight, but right now I’m rushing to catch the train…

It’s odd, the things I have been doing today, I have been wrapping up all the important ‘time essential’ things at work, tidying my desk and generally bringing things to a close… NO, I have not been fired but I have got the day off on Thursday (woohoo!) so I will not have to act like a zombie post JoCo concert tomorrow night.

I have also had a very girly moment in the last half an hour – wondering what to wear to said JoCo concert.  Do I:

a. wear jeans and t-shirt of choice?
b: dress up in a casual way?
c: dress up?

c requires a lot of effort and will hurt my feet
a and b mean I can wear my Sketchers and will have a happy feet night…
a means I will be comfortable in every way
b means at least I’ve made an effort.

See?  Leaving my comfort zone means I start to care what I look like.  I just wish I had the time to dye my hair – it really is starting to need it and I have decided to go mahogany for winter.  Probably a mistake as I will only be getting paler as the ice forms and dark hair?  But the only photo I like of myself is me with dark hair… so… yeah…

And for some reason my camera won’t focus!

Tomorrow’s post will be very very late… but at least it’ll be about something!

I spent most of the day being a total bum.  There was a weight to my fingers that meant that typing was an issue.  Much like now.

My eyes were wandering all over the place and my mind was following them.

And then the Malteser sized hail stones that hammered the building for about 5 minutes!

And the rain!  Oh, the rain… why didn’t it rain when I was outside?!  I left work and the stars were twinkling in the damn clear sky… and all I wanted was to feel… y’know?

SPOOKS!  Yes, there’s something to talk about.  I can’t believe that…

wait, are you going to watch this series?  Did you not watch tonight?

…I can’t believe that they did the thing they did in the FIRST EPISODE of the series.  I OMG’d loudly – more loudly than I have at Heroes.  Also, Richard Armitage – smart eye candy choice there BBC – yum!  But I can’t believe it…

So I am not a huge fan of the news right now.  It’s not that there is anything unusually horrible on it… it’s just so much less hopeful than usual.  The world is coming to an end.  Well, the money world.  And it’s going out bit by bit – small country by small country, bank by bank, lights being switched off the main grid and then powered back up by generators of the IMF.

And, no, I  don’t pretend to even vaguely understand it.  It just makes me sad.

The world really is run by oil isn’t it?

It’s funny, while I have this storm in my head, and the storm outside is really getting into the swing of things, that the world is going through this quiet change.

Yeah, I really don’t know what I’m talking about.  I’m sure it’s going to get real noisy soon.

The wind is blowing hard outside and the rain is steadily falling through my open window.  I need the air, I need to breathe.

I was only at work for 5 hours today but it felt like an age.  I got barely anything done and just felt useless.  Should have just stayed in bed.

I finished Breaking Dawn, book 4 of the Twilight Saga and now have to wait for Book 5… which isn’t anywhere near coming out. I am now at a loss for what to read.  I mean I have a stack of books that I have not yet read but… none of them appeal.

I think I may have to start printing out the blog posts that have been accumulating in my feed reader (when the number is over 4000 – that means you’re in trouble, right?) and taking them with me on the bus to and from work.  Actually that’s not the worst idea in the world…

I think tomorrow I may take some time to start looking at the CBT material I was given during my counselling session, but this may be just pipe dreams.  I might just dye my hair instead… Right now I am tired enough to sleep through the end of the world.

Workin’ all day long (do do do do doo)
Came home on the bus
Too knackered to write well (do do do do dum)
Or anything at all

So in 7 hours (do do do do doo)
I go back to work
I can’t wait to sleep and (do do do do dum)
Forget I agreed to that

But at least in the morning (do do do do doo)
I’ll be earning money
But what I really want (do do do do dum)
I some bloody rest

I know that this song sucks (do do do do doo)
But I have nothing else
And now that I’ve posted it (do do do do dum)
I go to bed

Okay, so I went, I saw, I listened, I experienced. I am in so much trouble with myself at the moment – damned heightened emotional state. I liked it. No, that’s wrong. i more than liked it. I felt that swell in my heart for more than a moment, felt what it is like to have passion again… and found myself literally singing and dancing in the rain.

Damned High School Musical 3.

From the first moments on the basketball court to the intensely peppy ending on the graduation field. As the camera focused on the hopeful, smiling, shining faces I had to admit it and let a joyful tear roll down my cheek. Choked up? Me? You can bet on it.

Okay, so had I seen it on TV or even with a different crowd then maybe I wouldn’t have reacted like this but, my God, if you had seen the kids faces. They were all so bright and shiny, their enthusiasm was contagious – they were singing along and cheering, some were even excitedly dancing in their seats. Some were wearing East High School basketball or cheerleaders uniforms, Oh, they didn’t need sugar to be high. There were what children are supposed to be – happy, carefree and full of hope.

Of course there were parts that were so cheesy it almost hurt but to see the joy surrounding me it was totally worth it.

I am never going to get the songs out of my head.

Sixteen, sixteen, sixteen minutes left – better get it right…

Sweet heavenly joy!  My ticket to joy arrived today!

A week today I will be having all the fun a person can have while keeping their clothes on.  I’m going to the Paul & Storm/ Jonathan Coulton concert in Manchester next week.  It’s my happy thing and I am so so so looking forward to it.  Ridiculously so.

It has been a crappy day so coming home to the ticket made me smile so much I almost cried.  My emotions are all over the shop at the moment.

My favourite song at the moment drifts between Bad ThIngs by Jace Everett (yes, the theme tune to True Blood) and Empty by Ray LaMontagne.  Yes, I am drifting between wanting someone to ‘do bad things to me’ and feeling ’so empty, so mischanged’.

Yes, I am back on the road to wanting to feel something other than the void surrounded by frustration.  Whether the thing I feel is great or terrible is up to the fates I suppose but right now I don’t care one way or the other.

Music usually pushes my soul one way or the other… This probably isn’t the time for another favourite – Jason Mraz’s Plane… although singing along to that is guaranteed to have the shiver run up my spine and the tears to flow…

Damn.