Now, I don’t usually agree with attacking kids. In fact I think it maybe the worst idea in the world - attack a child and you just make them more likely to come back and hurt you more… oh, and you get arrested which never looks fun.
But, the Mosquito Alarm sounds to be a marvellous idea and I want one. And, they are not illegal in this country (and there are no plans to ban it) and they are very popular with the authorities.
What do they do I hear you cry? They emit a high pitched sound that cannot be heard (because of some incredibly scientific reason) by anyone over the age of 25. This sound becomes annoying after about 10 minutes and causes a discomfort in the ears of those who can hear it. Target audience? Teenagers. More specifically, the gangs of layabout fuckwits that hang around on street corners and in our parks and outside the local shop making the place look untidy.
Now they just need to develop something similar for other groups. Door to Door religious fanatics? One to play down the phone line to call centre sales staff? Dawdlers in front of you in shops? Talkers in the cinema? Oh, the list is endless!
In other news, because I know you were dying to know… I went to the doctor’s today to have my blood test. What a palaver! I have so many holes in me I may change my name to sieve! They couldn’t find a vein in my arm so had to take it out of the back of my hand. I had to fill paediatric bottles (little ones) as they couldn’t draw enough out to fill a proper test tube thing. Results back next week. Let’s hope they find out what’s going on this time!
February 13th, 2008 at 1:56 am
Funny how these sorts of things are most popular with the people they don’t affect.
February 13th, 2008 at 2:13 am
I’ve never heard them called Mosquito Alarms, but I’ve been hearing about these things for years. I have no idea if they’re in use anywhere, but I wholeheartedly love the idea.
What you need to do is test kids’ resolve on Halloween… have tons of King Size Snickers bars taped to your front door but have several of those alarms sounding at full volume. See which triumphs!
As for religious fanatics, just develop one that emits a subsonic satanic grumble… “all shall perishhhhhhhhh!!!”
kapgar’s last blog post..Lovin’, touchin’, squeezin’…
February 13th, 2008 at 7:46 am
I so want one of those Mosquito Alarms. I wonder if you can get portable ones so you can torture smelly teenagers on the bus. Brilliant!
Selma’s last blog post..Love Never Dies
February 13th, 2008 at 8:28 am
Anything that causes grade A trauma to teens is a fantastic idea, in my opinion!
Good luck with the test results :o)
Penelope’s last blog post..Floor Guy Part II
February 13th, 2008 at 10:46 pm
yorksdevil - But you wouldn’t hang around annoying people and making a nuisance of yourself would you? It’s a temporary fix…
Kapgar - Your Halloween idea is delicously evil it just made me squeal in delight!
Selma - They are all portable from what I can gather… ooo, teenagers on the bus with their mobile phones playing crap dance music! Yes, be gone fowl destroyers of my bus ride peace!
Penelope - Thank you… News next Wednesday… Maybe they could be used by parents too… keep the little blighters in their rooms. Imagine a world free of teens!
Bec’s last blog post..Run Children Run!
February 18th, 2008 at 12:07 am
[...] But not on Wednesday, as that’s when I get my blood results back! [...]
May 7th, 2008 at 11:47 pm
[...] of Britain can hang out safely away from the good people. These would be surrounded by the lovely mosquito teenage alarms just in case they tried to escape… and they would have to be dropped off and picked up by [...]